It's hard to believe but after almost 6 months of getting on the scale every Wednesday I actually forgot to weigh in yesterday. So this week weigh in day is today.  I spent most of last week sick and as a result sleeping more than anything. I also missed my last two zumba classes. I really didn't know what to expect and I was pleased to see that I had lost another 2.8lbs making my total 48lbs lost! I'm getting to the point where people are starting to ask me 'how much weight have you lost' and I'm thinking that question is going to become embarrassing to answer. Not that I'm not proud of what I'm accomplishing but I'm not looking to shout 'hey guess what i used to be 50lbs more than I am now and yeah I'm still fat'. When that total is 100lbs and I'm still really heavy it's not going to feel good to admit I was that big. Mind you it's not as embarrassing as being as big as I was I just don't think I want to make a big deal about it. Maybe I'll start down playing my numbers. So when i reach my goal of 120lbs I can just smile and say 'oh yeah I lost 35lbs all together.   :-)  I see these people on Yahoo lately who lost 102lbs or 170lbs and I think I never want to be that person. I'd like to just quietly take off 215lbs shhhhh don't tell anyone. It will be our secret and if I can do it slowly enough maybe no one will notice. So far it's working. lol. That's not entirely true. Recently, people have begun to notice and make comments about how good I look and that does make me feel good but I just think as far as anyone needs to know we can keep my numbers small.

I'm happy to say I got up and started walking in the right direction. This has been a really difficult week for me in all parts of my life. I was very happy to see the scale this morning registering a 6.4lb loss. That tells me that last weeks gain was fluff. So I'm feeling pretty good today. My total loss as of today is 45lbs. I'm proud of that total but then I've been here before. I need to loose it all not just some so I keep going.

Hello world,
  It's been a bit since I was away on vacation and there was no Internet access on the lake. I arrived at the lake house on Tuesday and knowing I had to weigh in the next day (yes I brought my scale with me) I was good the first night. I was rewarded with a 2 and a half pound loss. Wednesday we went on a wine tour. It was a great deal of fun but I had far too much to drink. Overall I was very well behaved all week. The only really bad thing I ate was half a piece of cheese cake which admittedly is very bad. The big issue was that I was with my family and we drank too much most of the time. I knew that I would pay this week but nothing could have prepared me from this morning. I almost forgot it was weigh in day. I kinda wish I had. Not even 2 days of Zumba in a row could save me from the alarming 4.2lb gain I was greeted with this morning. Part of me feels like the scale must be wrong but I know weight loss isn't easy and weight gain is too easy.  The fact is I spent 3 days drinking liquid fat and that is the result. So, I came home on Saturday and got right back on track. That's all I can do. The gain is in my past and now I move forward. Today is a new beginning and I'm not going to beat myself up over my mistakes. This is a long road I'm on and if I occasionally need to sit down at the side of the road and take a break that's fine. As long as I don't turn back when i get up and start walking in the wrong direction I'll get to my destination eventually. :)

Good Morning, it's weigh in day again. This week I went out and bought a weight watchers scale because I have heard they are supposed to be very accurate. Well, I used my old scale this morning which gifted my hard work with a 3lb weight loss. I was very pleased with this. I then hoped on the weight watchers scale. Hmmm this scale credited me with a 5lb. loss. I think I'll play it safe and count from the old scale. Yay 3lbs. that's awesome and I'm happy with that. Next week I will begin counting down from the new scale and I will just leave that 2lbs in limbo where I'm sure it belongs. On a much more important note then scale drama I feel great today. I noticed right when I woke up this morning that my 'back fat' ( those of you who have it know what I mean) had gone down and that my legs felt slimmer on the outer thighs. All those squats finally paying off. Of course the difference is in millimeters and it is only noticeable to me. I have lost a total of 41lbs. now and I'm very proud of myself. Not a soul notices or says anything but I don't let it get to me.  I know one day I'll reach the point when I have lost over 100lbs and someone will finally look at me and say 'have you lost weight?' to which I will promptly reply 'I don't know maybe a few pounds'. :)  Next week is my vacation in wine country (well NY wine country). It could be a real test for me or maybe I will paddle out to the middle of the lake in a canoe with my copy of Walden and commune with nature. I may not have Internet out there so it may be a while before you hear from me again but I will be back.